Everyone wants to be happy, including me. But now, I'm not sure. Is it really happiness that I should be seeking?
I've seen people being happy. See is the operative word, because more often than not, happy people can't help but show the world that they are happy. They blog, post pictures, post status updates, and even share unsolicited stories about their happiness. Good for them; I'm glad that things are going their way.
Thing is, 'yun nga... things are going their way, so much so that some of them have become oblivious to what's happening around them. They forget everything else -- the world, their family, their friends, and even themselves. In attempts to preserve this happiness, they blindly fight to keep things going their way, even to the point of losing everything else that *used to* matter. They stop listening to other friends' advice, blissfully unaware that there are, in fact, other things to be concerned about. Eh sa masaya ako eh. Why can't others be just plain happy for me?
Me, me, me. That's what they all start to think about. ME AND MY HAPPINESS. I am happy, so others should be happy for me or else shut the f*** up.
Happy people eventually lose touch with the rest of the world. They lose their ability to empathize with the rest. They lose themselves in their own little bubble of happiness, forgetting that there are other things in life that are just as important as their happiness. Happy people become selfish people.
If this is the case, maybe I don't want to be happy. Maybe happiness isn't for me. I don't want to turn into a selfish, delusional, pleasure-seeking junkie. This is not my definition of a purposeful life. Maybe there are deeper things to aspire for, instead of happiness. Maybe... Peace?